Today while getting the lowdown on how to wear the robe, yada yada… the young man- I take that back. Ever since I’ve been told a number for my son’s height, I’ve been seeing more and more mid…little people. Kinda like when one is pregnant, they see all pregnant women. Well, as of late, all I see are petite monsieurs.

Anyhow, while the tech was reading me my MRI rights, he started in with “do you have metal… piercings…. ” and my answers have always been “straight no’s for everything.”

Well today, I was supposed to remind them of my port… and I was too busy planning which station I was going to listen to (classical; was tired of Disney, not in mood for Christmas and had enough of Sinatra), that I forgot.

Tech: Now, it says you have a port.

Me: (awakening) YES! I DO!!

Tech: Would you like me to access it during the MRI?

and what I almost said was…. Judy’s my port bitch! Instead, I gave him my F.NO look while placing my arm out for the IV.