My child’s school is working with us to find a way to get my middle back into classes. Around Thanksgiving break, she began to suffer from multiple panic attacks and is once again becoming agoraphobic. Now, according to our very own Liberace, our child suffers and will always suffer from Panic Disorder. Much like IBS, there will be downtimes and times of flair ups.
All that being said, the school would like to reinstate an IEP that we never utilized– extra time on tests and homework check ins. When we put the IEP in place, it was because my child was not performing well due to her anxiety, the adjustment from elementary to middle school and poor work habits. Since the Covid pandemic, she was home for the 18 months and thrived in her school work.
When school resumed for her post vaccine, her grades and life resumed and she is currently an A student with a C+ in Spanish- which, she hates.
Now add into the mix that her mother, moi, is effing unwell. She has to see me laying around, or stuck in the bathroom, or not in my kitchen. She sees the amount of pills that I have to take, watches me spend part time at every hospital on the Mainline, and finds many friends and family here at any give time.
I’d say, her routine- as well as that of my other children, is not normal.
The fact that she’s kept up good grades while knowing her mother is now on Chemo, is amazing to me. Sure, not going to school for two weeks is upsetting and not good…. but does that mean she needs more time on tests, homework check ins and perhaps… other health impairments’ supports?
Perhaps, and I am only going out on a limb here, but perhaps… the cause of her anxiety and fear of leaving her safe place is related to my illness and that she’s also waiting for the results of my scans? That she is seeing the difference a year can make and that worries her? That the older she is getting, the less time she may have with me?
I mean, I could be wrong here, but I do remember not being able to go to middle school just due to fights with friends…. so, I’m thinking that she just needs a little space to resume.
At the very least, just imagine you are a thirteen year old girl and your mother has a cancer that is stronger than every new drug, would an IEP be the cure all?