Each time I get a call from my doctors’ offices or come to the hospital and go through the first three chains of question command, I get the same ridiculous questions. Now, before you roll your eyes and think, but of course they need to ask- they want to be safe….

What I mean is this….

I see the three wise men… Pulmonary, Cardiology and Oncology. Now, even with the minimal brain capacity… let’s think for a minute which kind of patients visit each type of doctor. For example… what is the main reason people go proactively to a cardiologist?? Could it be the tightness in their chest? The difficulty in breathing?? How about the pulmonary doctor- aka: lung specialist. Are runners going there for good luck?? Lastly, tell me… if one had cancer (pick one- apparently they’re not all the same so pick one wisely) would they feel up to par on their breathing?

So… when asked by all three of the above offices’ receptionists and the parking attendants if I am having trouble breathing, a tightness in my chest, and if it has gotten worse…. do you want I should lie outright… the way I had to be seen by the specialist in the first place…. or could you perhaps recognize that the answer will be ‘all of the above” and simply ask: Did you travel recently?