The other evening I was trying to show my mother how easy Instacart works- so she doesn’t have to subject herself to germs and chaos. I tried to let her know that even though I wanted to put things in her cart, it didn’t mean she had to purchase them yet.
After convincing her that it was free to just look, I started asking her about which produce she would want.
Me: What produce do you want?
Mother: Angel Sweet Tomatoes
Me: (searching) They don’t have them; what about other brands?
Mother: I only want Angel Sweet; they are the best tomato, the sweetest and everyone who eats them loves them. Then I can’t shop there.
Me: You can’t eat another brand?? With dressing they’re all the same! I’m trying to help you and you just don’t want it!
Mother: I’m fine food shopping myself.
Me: (Searching another store) What about Sunset Angel Sweet tomatoes?
Mother: I don’t think they’re the same.
Me: It says Angel Sweet…. it can’t say Sunset Angel Sweet????
Mother: (looking at screen) Maybe they’re ok. How much are they? ….They’re only $2.30 at the Giant. Nevermind.
Me: You know how much tomatoes are??? Can’t you just get them??? They deliver!!!
Mother: What about Kosher Deli?
Me: (searching) They don’t have any.
Mother: Then this isn’t going to work. I thought this was Giant?
Me: I don’t know which Giant it is- how about we look at another store?
Mother: I like Giant.
Me: (looking elsewhere) Wegmans doesn’t have it either. Neither does Aldi, Walmart, Target…. just buy your own tomatoes and deli… what else do you need?
Mother: Hefty Trash bags.
Me: (searching; don’t have that brand) Aren’t bags bags??? What is with you and brands?? They have store brand!
Mother: (looking at screen). They’re cheaper at Acme…I’m not paying more…
Me: Again you and the prices!!!!! It saves you time and is convenient to order!
Mother: I’m fine with going.
Me: It’s a good thing you weren’t in the Holocaust! You’d turn down the tomatoes if they weren’t Angel Sweet! I just don’t understand how you make it all so difficult! I’m trying to help you and you just don’t want my help!!! Go get sick, get germs- I don’t care!
Mother: Why are you getting so angry at me??
……… Flash forward to today, when Hubby came back from his 10th trip to BJ’s and I said….
Me: Oh, I would have had you get trash bags for my mom.
Hubby: She can have the ones I got from Target that I don’t like.
Me: She only wants Hefty.
Hubby: Oh she wants Hefty? ? ?
Me: (Calling my mom) Do you want bags we got from Target?
Mother: Oh, I was just at the market and forget to get trash bags! Sure!
Me: They’re not Hefty.
Mother: I’ll get them another time.
I give up.