Everyone is a Schmuck

The other day I had to take Annie Anxious to the doctors again- since they were out of the HPV vaccine; this time, we were only seeing the nurse.

Now, my daughter is fine with needles (concerning) but still, I held her hand. After the nurse was finished, she gave me a one-sheet on the vaccine and what to expect in terms of side effects- if any. Then, she proceeded to set a timer for 15 minutes- which I do not previously recall, when my other daughter got this.

Nurse: OK, I set the timer for 15 minutes so you’ll stay here until it rings; just to make sure you’re ok.

Me: (Quickly glancing at the one-sheet for the side effects portion, I saw my life flash before me.)

Kid: Why would I have to stay here for 15 minutes?

Me: (Eyes protruding towards nurse to keep it simple)

Nurse: Well, there could be some side effects…

Kid: What kind of side effects?

Me: (Profusely sweating and praying the nurse sees my sockets empty- without alerting my kid whose eyes are simultaneously on me.)

Nurse: Well some patients have feinted…

Me: If they haven’t eaten at all…

Nurse: …. or they feel some heart palpi (now feels the burning hole I’ve tried to signal her with)

Kid: Like a heart murmur?

Fade to black.

 

About Lady in Red

mom of 3
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