Dear Abby is Dead

There is something about my people that irks me. Now, I get that people inherently want to be helpful and come to the rescue…. but please don’t.

On the whole, we have been to 17 therapists of varying degrees. Some retired, one died, one should have died, one moved, etc. One didn’t have a medical license to prescribe so we had to see someone else…. so in short, that’s where the large number comes from. It’s not because someone was terrible and we kept hopping around like one does until they find the right colorist.

Anyway, while hanging out with my Mahjongg crew, my situation came up and that’s when the rolodex of suggested providers was presented to me. Now, if this were a foreign field to me, I’d be thrilled! I may even go as far to say that I’d be appreciative of the suggestions if I was a novice…. but I’m a tenuredĀ vet when it comes to therapists for my children so if I seem snippy, please pardon my behavior.

It’s just …. well, here’s an analogy to best explain my frustration. Imagine you have a rare form of cancer and you found the best known doctor to treat you. You have a nice report with them, you’ve started your treatment, and then you run into some friends. And those friends hear what’s happening and say, “Oh, Dr. NoGood? No Good! I have someone better for you- Dr. NoGood likes to do radical treatments and likes to do x,y and z. My brother has a friend who knows the neighbor who’s excellent in the field of cancer….”

Exactly- you’d tune out because for one: you already started with someone- presumably after you already spent time researching their credentials and history… and two: maybe the doctor you’re going to recommend doesn’t necessarily deal with the type of cancer or treatment that you need?

In short: try not to hinder the trust required for healing between a doctor and a patient just because you believe you know best.

About Lady in Red

mom of 3
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