Monthly Archives: July 2019

Premie Wipes

Hubby refuses to buy baby wipes since they aren’t flushable. Instead, he buys flushable wipes that are only good on the asses of squirrels, mice and rats. For my ass, I really need Bounty doused in lotion. Unfortunately, these matchbook sized … Continue reading

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This Can’t Be Right

At 5:23pm I started my prep for my colonoscopy. At 7:04 pm, I went to the bathroom thinking I would be in the way beginning stages of said prep. Rather, I went from 0-100 in an hour and forty one … Continue reading

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Baby Bjorn

All summer I’ve been hobbling around with my child redecorating my womb. Some days I get to go for walks- if I’ve had good behavior. Other times, we go on short jaunts around the block- before my glass slipper disintegrates. … Continue reading

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It Doesn’t Make Any Sense

Today hubby informed me that there┬ámay┬ábe some glass he didn’t see upstairs. Apparently our kennel of dogs got excited and banged into my one table of glass items- and knocked them to the ground. Now, I know (according to hubby … Continue reading

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Irrelevant

Today whilst walking I received a call from the nurse about my upcoming colonoscopy; she wanted to ask me some questions. Nurse: Hi, just have a few questions to ask you; is this a good time? Me: Sure! Nurse: Have … Continue reading

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Groupon

This ad was for a discount to their salon, however, their facial expressions are so unique, that I just had to post. Now tell me, does this ad look inviting to the average Jane to want to switch stylists (probably … Continue reading

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George Banks

I am trying to plan a beautiful yet cost efficient B’not mitzvah. Thus far I’ve done my own montage, found my own invites, created my own logo, bought my own centerpieces, worked a deal with the entertainment co., we’re bringing … Continue reading

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Jesus Sighting

My daughter is going through this phase where she doesn’t trust her father will do the right thing. Some examples are: she doesn’t feel safe when he drives because he can’t see (true). He can never find anything even when … Continue reading

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Two Can Play At This Game

Hubby and I share custody of the car; easier to practice on a vehicle. Now, hubby will mostly drive his electric bike to work and I’ll use the car- 90% of the time. This means, I have it all day … Continue reading

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Sweet & Sassy

I am thigh deep in planning my kids’ b’not mitzvah- thanks to Pinterest and my warped mind. Part of the concept is using colorful mannequins and putting wigs or hats on them- creating the “sass.” Now, these aren’t Woolworth mannequins- … Continue reading

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