When Hubby is home, walking into my home after a day of errands is like walking in Natzi Germany, in broad daylight, while wearing Tefilin the day after Kristallnacht. You see, thanks to a certain App, he gets NASDAQ updates on my expenditures.

Hubby: What’s Manischewitz for $5?

Me: Matzot.

Hubby: You bought 10 $5 boxes??

Me: No, some were the dessert mixes.

Hubby: What’s Paskesz?

Me: Kosher marshmallows.

Hubby: You spent $$$$ at the market?! Do you even look at prices??

Me: It’s for Passover!

Hubby: What’s that package over there?

Me: They’re going back.

Hubby: That’s good!

Me: They’re too small.

Hubby: What’s that box over there?

Me: Son’s cleats.

Hubby: What’s wrong with the two pair of cleats over there?

Me: They’re too big.

Anyhow, before the Fuhrer comes back from his errands, I best put my son’s new wardrobe away.