Monthly Archives: May 2018

Lazar Wolf

  The other night my eldest asked me to help her shave her legs since she had gotten a cut on the other leg. When I went into the bathroom with her and lathered her up with shaving cream, I … Continue reading

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When They Go Low….

When I was finally brought back into the room, after fighting with the attending nurse that I did not need to be weighed, she began to take my blood pressure. Nurse: Your blood pressure is 130/60… that’s pretty high for … Continue reading

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“The Doctor Won’t See You Now”

Last night, I had my annual visit with the nurse practitioner. I had been told to arrive 15 min. prior to my appointment and had received the text alerts for days before. So imagine my surprise when I was greeted by the lone … Continue reading

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What Would You Do?

My daughter’s favorite pastime is watching John Quiñones. That’s right, she could binge watch his show from dawn until dusk. But it is one episode that caught my attention that perhaps I need to block adult television. It went something like….”I’m … Continue reading

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Let it Go, Can’t Hold it Back Anymore

Sometimes I am afraid to pass gas for fear of passing part shart. And I don’t know what it is that I’m eating that causes me to generously contribute to the amount of methane in our atmosphere, but my gas … Continue reading

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Mother of the Year

The other day I forgot my eldest had a field trip and needed a throw away lunch. Instead, I allowed her to stay home and sleep a little bit longer since we had been out late the evening before and … Continue reading

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Stand by Me

I’m not sure why this song reminds me of me and the lawn man, but it does. Lately I have been feeling as if I should be inviting him to family picnics or weekend jaunts to go fishing. It’s literally … Continue reading

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It’s a Start

For the past few weeks I have been waiting for the warmer weather to persist so that I could think about taking a walk- after all, it’s been 9 months since I’ve been active. In any event, there has always been a … Continue reading

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Turbine Engines

We’ve had no air conditioner for over two weeks. I know, times are tough in the burbs in our 4 bedroom estate…. but no air nonetheless. In the winter you may recall, we had no heat for two weeks. In … Continue reading

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Shoeless Joe Jackson

Our “Jack of all trades,” land man, has no body fat, no teeth, filthy nails and shows no attempts at personal hygiene care. He wears the same two pants and torn shirt- during any season. He smokes the grass he … Continue reading

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