Monthly Archives: June 2017

I Carried A Watermelon

Last week I finally went across the street to our new neighbor’s home to welcome them with a homemade cake. Despite moving in months ago, I was quite busy and well, the least I could do was feign some interest … Continue reading

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Put It On My Tab

We’ve spent two years in therapy making sure I treat each of my children as individuals. I make certain they have separate teachers to safeguard their uniqueness. Spending quality time separately has been a conscious effort that so far, I’ve … Continue reading

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Damned If I Don’t

Last year, Mein Kempf, I mean, my sister, “Big Brother’d” my letters to my child at camp. She told me that 90% were inappropriate or unacceptable. When my child came home from camp, I found piles of unopened mail from me…”I … Continue reading

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How Tired Am I?

…So tired that I don’t care to open the window that the annoying fly has been hurling itself at for the past week. …I don’t even care to remove the poppy seed stuck in between #12 on my upper jaw- … Continue reading

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8-Track

This evening my Bat Mitzvah DVD arrived. You read it, I had the Video Recording of my special day over 30 years ago, upgraded for the off chance I want to relive the moments. Essentially what this means is this: in another … Continue reading

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One Is Such A Lonely Number

While market shopping for the second time this week, I noticed something monumental. Gone is the entire belt filled past capacity- in fact, there is enough room for my belongings as well as my grab and go cart. In a … Continue reading

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If It Looks Like A Duck

There has to be something very … what’s the word…. unsettling, to open up my email to find this… And judging by the amount of funeral and burial insurance emails I’m receiving, I’m wondering if I’m even able to get life insurance … Continue reading

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“25, 25, 25, Do I hear 30?”

This morning… all because I asked my son to urinate before his 40 minute bus ride to camp…. I had to drive him. When I arrived in the lot, I found the owner of the camp and explained the situation (essentially, I have no parental control… you do better). Three men later, this is what […]

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Let My People Go!

This was my son when I took him to camp…. and ran. Actually, I had to wait over 40 minutes for someone to be able to coax him out of the car.

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Naycation

The kids are all gone for the summer… all I have left to do is quickly donate and/or sell 10 years of collectible crap. Sounds easy, right? ….T’would be if I didn’t have to look at two different camps’ top … Continue reading

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