Monthly Archives: October 2016

Today while I was finally sitting down in the kitchen I heard a loud shriek- followed seconds later by incessant screams. Without even seeing what happened, I could tell my son unzipped his feetie pajamas and snagged his penis. Instantly, … Continue reading →

That’s right- Halloween! The time of year when my children swear to me months before, that they’ll be the costume they chose “if only you would buy it for me,” only to find out the day before Halloween that it either A: … Continue reading →

While reading my child a bedtime story the other day I commented on the fact that she needed to shower. She told me that she would shower in the morning and was fine. However, when I went down to sniff … Continue reading →

Remember those bags; the ones from Bloomingdales? Well, I think CVS should provide those bags- just so I can fit my receipt into it.

My children come home with friends and often I will help them with their homework. I love to see how other children write so when reading one of her friend’s paper, I was shocked and appalled. “Claire, can you read … Continue reading →

While typing away on my computer in the wee hours of this evening, I hear, “beep beep beep! beep beep beep!…” It was a medical alarm sounding three stories down. So as not to wake my hard to fall asleep children … Continue reading →

I’ve decided that I will no longer just flip through the channels at my tenant’s apartment- since the remote often works slower than the TV. That’s only an issue when the TV gets stuck on a naked scene or heavy … Continue reading →

Let me start by saying the two things I hate most are the terms: “ladies” and “ma’am”. I’m not exactly sure what about those words evoke a feeling of homocide, but the point is, I go cray-cray. The other day I … Continue reading →

The other day I had the pleasure of taking two of my children to the podiatrist for some wart removals; vomit. What you must first know is that I was asked to not ever bring two of my children together … Continue reading →

This evening my children and I were gathered on the rug in the playroom, looking into the newest hamster’s cage. Because it is a new hamster- just days in our home, we have tried patiently to just sit daily by his … Continue reading →