Monthly Archives: June 2009

Wouldn’t it be nice?

This afternoon, way past non-eater’s daily scheduled nap, she and I returned from a day in the sun at her bubbie’s pool. As soon as I unhooked her seatbelt from her carseat, I knew I was in trouble. The faux … Continue reading

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Extreme Makeover

I never get my hair done. Lately, I wash it….when I remember to or when my mother says, “you stink.” I’m not one to go get a manicure or pedicure; I’m all about being with my kids. So when I … Continue reading

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A rose by any other name…

Last year I decided I wanted to drecorate the deck with white lights. I say, “white lights” but in reality, they’re Christmas lights. Because I’m Jewish, …white’s not so bad. It took three hours in the dead of summer and … Continue reading

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All she needs is a fruit of the loom top and cigarette

My child that eats has a problem. Every time she eats, she runs her paws through her hair, so much so, that she looks like a fisherman away at sea. Each and every meal, that kid ends up greasy. Hair … Continue reading

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What you say?

Everyone knows that I am a germaphobe. You go outside and play, come in and wash hands. Playdates leave, wash the toys. Go into a bathroom, use feet for it all and then throw out the shoes! That being said… … Continue reading

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Mother Goose would be so proud

This morning non-eater was playing in her playroom and singing to her dolls. “Frere Jacques, Frere Jacques, dormez-vous? Dormez-vous? Sonne Lemontine, Sonne lemontine, God Damn Dog, God Damn Dog.

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Sh*t

I know I have a potty mouth, and I truly have gotten better at blurting things out. …Now, I spell. While shopping at BB&B the other day, I forgot to take the storage bins I had purchased, since they were … Continue reading

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Revolving doors

Often times, my children find themselves out of their beds and in mine. I can’t exactly pinpoint where this habit formed, but no doubt it was out of exhaustion. In any event, I have two light sleepers and a dog … Continue reading

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