I always said, if I got back near my fighting weight, that I would gladly run through the town neked.

*This is the next best thing

*Taken last week
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woMAN Down

My doctor was not happy that I lost another six pounds, making my total weight loss nearly (if not) 50 lbs. And while she brought out the host of other reasons surrounding my loss, I was happy.

Now some will ask, Rochelle, are you still doing Keto? To that I would reply, ish. I don’t necessarily avoid all bread or fruits… but I do set limits… and that is, when I have an appetite.

And before you say, “well as soon as you stop watching, it will all come back…” I will tell you that my side effects from chemo have decided to contribute to my plight.

You see, the past few sessions of chemo have caused vomiting a few days later. Not extensive puking but enough to make me not want to eat again. And yesterday’s double episode was just the impetus to avoid food and drinks at all costs, today.

Probably not the best reaction since I am also taking an anti-biotic for a sinus infection… which could be why today I thought, I don’t know how much longer I can manage.

But only because the radiation and the sinus pills cause massive D, which only aggravates Mr. and Mrs. Assberry and there was zero way I’d ever use a public bathroom… so that caused greater stomach pain which then ignited my gag reflex for another bout of bile… and all before third period!

Coincidentally, today a woman from HR reached out to me via email, to check on my inquiry of taking some time off,,, while dabbling in the same convo with my psychiatrist.

Lastly, if getting into bed at 3:45pm and sleeping til the next day, doesn’t scream REST, I don’t know what does.

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Negative Nellies

For Black Friday I decided to spend three hours in the chemo recliner. Since it was the day after Thanksgiving, it was even less crowded. Unfortunately for me, Trudy of Notre Dame had to pick my port.

Anyhow, with only one other guest, I was able to have hubby keep me company. While sitting 7 feet from this other person, it was hard to ignore the conversation she and the nurse were having.

*The entire dialogue is happening simultaneously between the nurse and the girl; hubby and me.

Nurse: (to young girl) So when do you go back to college?

Girl: (to nurse) Well I have another doctor’s appointment Monday so probably Tuesday.

Me: (to hubby) Shame.

Hubby: (to me) What’s happening in this world?

Nurse: What are you studying?

Girl: Business but I’m not sure what I want to be.

Hubby: She has no idea does she?

Me: Nope; her future is over.

Nurse: I didn’t know what kind of nurse I wanted to be so I just took a lot of courses. You should try a little bit of everything until you know what you want to be.

Me: Uh…. dead’s what I’m thinking.

Hubby: Wow, she has no future.

Nurse: Well, your iron transfusion is finished and hopefully this will give you more engery.

Hubby: Uh…. iron…. so no chemo?

Me: Oh gee, we read that one wrong.

Needless to say, I learned that not everybody sits there for chemo; the girl will have a future and the nurse who dabbled in all arenas is a sick ef for choosing oncology.

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Latest & Greatest

Shall we get up to speed on the shit show starring moi?

My scans showed progression on my spine to another central area- the reason I am limping and why it hurts to walk.

We decided to check in with Georgetown – despite the fact that otherwise, my medicine is working elsewhere.

He is BFF with Sloan and knows of a phase one trial that I would be a candidate for. He ordered another liquid biopsy to determine if I still have Ros-1 or if another cancer is chiming in. The results from that biopsy will be back on or by 11/28/2022.

If I am still showing my mutation then I have some options:

  1. Continue with the chemo and pill since it is keeping the rest of my body stable.
  2. Get on the phase 1 trial which is showing promising hope for the other dying people

Now, for option 2, time is ticking in the sense that I would be able to “get in” now, but at some point in the next few months (unknown but likely 1-2) I will not qualify.

Here is what I picture my decision is like…

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Today I was awoken at 2:10 pm from the evening prior- apparently I did need to sleep. In any event, I realized that I needed to go and get bloodwork for my Black Friday chemo event and quickly showered and dressed.

Since my middle needed to also get bloodwork, she and hubby came with.

Typically, I will wake up and get to the hospital by 7am in order to beat the crowds, so this afternoon at the ripe hour of 3:24 pm, I figured I should make haste.

Unfortunately, my give a shit, I’m too tired to care, don’t feel well attitude played a hand at my decision to plow ahead and not swerve for the suicidal squirrel who decided to cross when I’ve no doubt he saw me coming… caused it to limp the rest of the way across the street.

In years past, I would sooner hit a pole or call my friends in devastation if I saw a dead anything in the road- but not today.

That’s right, today I figured, it’s survival of the fastest, until I looked over at my child who gasped at me with shock and a look of disgust.

Please don’t tell your sister.”

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Rotisserie Rochelle

Today happened. I worked in the morning, stopped home to pick up hubby and then was off to Bubbie’s so we could all go down to Penn.

Once there, I got my restaurant “beeper” and sat amongst the living dead. Now, since I knew what to expect, I sat scrolling through emails until I was called to the back.

There, I was given orders on how to put on the two robes- remembering this time to put the first one on covering me front, and was told to wait in the waiting room.

After around ten minutes, the nurse came to walk me down the very long and white hallway- to Linac 5.

Two things to note: I had to walk the equivalent of one city block to the very end…. when I was there to get radiation for my spine (aka… why I cannot walk). The second thing is, the hallway when I had to walk back from radiation, reminded me of those movies where the person dies and is in a hospital gown, walking from location to location waiting for the “next” step.

Once in Linac 5… the 5th room, I entered a small maze to get to the radiation table. There waiting for me was my blue mold for me to enter. Unfortunately for me, I was a lot skinnier last week when fitted and I had a much more difficult time getting into it.

Within several minutes of being readjusted to the laser, I was left alone to not move a millimeter (you know, for fear of puncturing my bowels with this targeted, heavy dose of r.)

While the process took about twenty five minutes, holding on to my “ring” for dear life made it feel somewhat longer. The good thing was, I still had to hang on two more times.

Changing room
Long walk
As if I’m walking to the beach
Blue cast to be still

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Looking back on my childhood, I suppose I could place the first time I experienced misophonia. May….be I was in first or second grade and we were dining with my family at our usual Chung Hing restaurant and my mom-mom ordered spare ribs. I do recall that later that evening my pop-pop yelled at both me and my sister for possibly making fun of how she was eating it/possibly talking with food. I could be wrong… but the evidence below pans out.

In any case typically when I’m within close quarters of someone else eating- depending on their level of self-awareness, I could go from zero to one hundred like that!

How would that look? …Well, I would start turning and staring at the chewer, I would make angry faces at them and/or I would start talking very loudly that the person near me is chewing too loudly!

The following is a brief list of noises that bother me:

Breathing through one’s nose. That includes breathing/eating simultaneously.

Swallowing (anything) while on the phone (Cat)

Chewing. Chewing and breathing and talking

Gum clicking- zero tolerance

Gums smacking

The sound of the “clicking” the mouse makes

The aklszjflkasdjfiodjfioljfkl when someone types!

Today, I was out of my mind…

Turn volume up
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Finding Rochelle

Today there was a fire drill- not a surprise since the weather was perfect. Anyhow, if you could imagine hundreds of thousands of fish swimming one way and then me in my scooter trying to get through, scrambling to make a path for myself and my pod.

Anyhow, when we all reached the front of the building, one of my little guppies runs up to me, panting and says,

“Rochelle-Rochelle…. I’m back from the bathroom.”

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Whoops, I Did It Again!

Our cantor is retiring after thirty-two years. The entire weekend has been devoted towards him and his family.

Beginning Friday night, the service was packed and the oneg (desserts) were fantastic. So many people came out to celebrate with him and his family.

Shabbat was celebrated with a special luncheon catered by our famous B the Caterer and this afternoon, a special concert in his honor.

Hundreds were to be in attendance for this Diva performance and a farewell Taste of Israel dinner.

Anyhow, about a half hour leading up to this special event, I decided to use Siri to inquire if my sister would be going- for if she were, then I’d definitely go as well.

Unfortunately, I kept texting the wrong person, so naturally I went.

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…it looks like we’ve got airspace!

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